This is an English translation of “அவனை எனக்குத் தெரியாது”, a poignant
short story written by Australia based Srilankan writer Theivigan Panchalingam.
Translated into English by Saravanan Karmegam.
1
Some consistories
had requested the people to ring the bells in churches spread all over
Australia at about six in the evening on the day Arul Kumaran was to be
executed and offer their prayers for his soul rest in peace.
2
Thavaranjini was
wailing inconsolably hammering the iron gates of the jail with her hands. She
bawled helplessly, struggled to drag herself out even after the permitted time
to meet Arul Kumaran was over. The words, ‘This will be the last meeting’
got broiled again and again in her helpless, louder wails that rose up from her
heart. The embers of that broil fell off as hapless, wretched groans “They are
going to kill my son. Let them all perish”. Her screams laden with the profound
misery of motherhood hit the prison walls that stood with all its indifference,
and got receded into oblivion without any response. The prison guards dragged
her out and threw her away.
Akila who was
standing near her also tried to reason out with the officials but in vain.
Thavaranjini’s husband Karalasingam was standing helpless, wiping his tired,
reddened eyes with his shirt collar. He paced fast to Thavaranjini hearing
Akila’s feeble request to hold her mother from falling. He brought her out carefully
arm-supporting her, with her one hand encircling his
neck. Thavaranjini was completely worn-out without any traces of energy
left in her body.
As they reached
the entrance of the prison complex where stood a big arch made of iron engraved
with block letters “Kerobokan Prison” on both sides, the prison guard opened a
small wicket gate to let them out. They came out of the prison complex.
No sooner had they
come out than a group of media persons carrying their paraphernalia-cameras,
video and audio recorders and microphones - surrounded Thavaranjini’s family,
nearly laid a siege around the three.
“Is it certain
that Arul Kumaran would be executed tomorrow?”
“What did Arul
Kumaran say you last?”
“What did Arul
Kumaran eat last?”
“Has the
government of Australia given any last hour assurance to save him from the
death sentence?”
Thavaranjini
covered her face with the hem of her sari with one hand, and strode fast
holding the collar of her husband Karalasingam with another and whimpered aloud
through her veil, “No…No…Please…leave us alone…please…please”
The journalists
were intelligent enough that they could pull them out separately for quizzing.
Some of them targeted Akila with some specific queries. The rest of them held
out their microphones closer nestling against Karalasingam’s neckline. The
news-hungry mob of journalists now surrounded their car as well, stuck out
their microphones and recorders into the car through its glass windows and
doggedly repeated the same questions they had asked a while ago. The driver
closed all the glass windows. He grew tense seeing the unruly behaviour of
journalists dashing against the car from all directions. As he tried exhausting
all his tricks to take out the car from the crowd somehow, the cameramen were
struggling to capture the faces of Thavaranjini’s family members from all
possible angles as to publish them on their media. Akila covered her face with
the hem of her mother’s sari. Thavaranjini seemed to have buried her face into
her sobs. Karalasingam was sitting stiff, devoured by the gloom of losing his
son.
3
The dew drops were
falling off through the leaves. After their training sessions were over, all
the trainees were asleep in that long shed roofed with a blue tarpaulin whose
edges were tightly pulled and tied to pickets. I glanced at Balan
lying near me. He had gone into deep slumber without even realising his mouth
slobbering in its corner. My eyes grew wide open, astonished at what I saw in
the training ground while slowly getting up without disturbing his sleep.
After we slept the
previous night, Velavan Master’s trainees might have arranged those rifles in
order. They were kept erect neatly in rows in a long corridor of the
leaves-thatched shed near the training ground. The body quivered as if the sun
entered into it at seeing them. I ran in, woke Balan up and narrated what I
saw. He came out swiftly, and glanced at those rifles.
Shining in wooden
hue in their middles and bottoms, those dark iron weapons seemed to be waiting
for us with temerity. We smiled at each other. I stroked my left elbow
instinctively. It had been an arduous training of running, jumping, crawling
and somersaulting that lasted through several weeks along with Kottan. We just
lived in utter despise thinking Kottan was responsible for all our callous
skins and scars. We found solace in all our chatters that the rifle would save
us from all perils the moment we could clasp it in our hands.
An old wound in
the rough elbow was found dried up. Everyone rose.
The running
session that day was more enthusiastic than usual. Balan was hopping, running
elatedly. Velavan Master then arrived in, and announced something specific
about rifles. We received it in our hands one after another. When it was given
to our hands after making entry of its numbers, we felt its nippiness sending a
shiver through our body like a
bullet.
When we came back
to our shed after lunch, we found Balan cleaning every part of the rifle so
attentively with a piece of cloth in white and yellow. I watched him cleaning
it very closely, intently. He would wipe it vigorously and then blow on its
butt and keenly observe it squinting one of his eyes as if to verify whether
any dust particle was still sticking to it and escaping his close scrutiny. He
would then clean it again rubbing vigorously. If he got a glance of me enjoying
all his manoeuvres through his corner eyes, he would just give out a silent
grin curling his lips. Gradually I began to feel that a component of my life
had got severed from me and started living in that iron body.
R-56. It wasn’t a
new rifle. It must be a military rifle captured in one of the camp attacks.
Yet, it had been captured from someone, forcefully. We didn’t know how many men
would have died or been blown up before it fell into our hands. But it was very
certain that it had come to us at the cost of deaths. Those who fight on the
field would only know not only their freedom but also their weapon comes at the
cost of laying down their lives. I began to feel the waning worth of my
existence since the day the rifle became a part of my life.
I had learnt
conversing privately with my rifle when there were no trainings or conflicts
around. I started sharing my experiences of reading books with my rifle. After
cleaning it thoroughly, if I started reading along with my rifle, it would only
last through up to some odd pages, paragraphs, and sometimes a couple of
sentences. We could only enjoy that much of luxury of time. Balan would also
listen to me lying near.
When a stray
bullet takes away my life piercing my body tomorrow, this rifle might fall into
the hands of enemy. He might shoot me once again with this rifle to ensure I am
dead and then take this rifle to his camp. Worst, when my body lies dead in an
uninhabited land, this rifle might cry for me lying near to my body. Its iron
parts might shed tears listening to a story I recite that time.
I believed that
the rifle had a life in its body. Balan too, like me, strongly believed that he
had an inseparable life with his rifle.
4
That day was my
birthday. I was stationed at Balamottai forward post to watch the movements of
army. We were hiding in a bunker along with an M-16 Colt Commando assault rifle
captured in the previous conflict. We were enormously attached to that American
made rifle. Apart from it being a captured weapon in fight, it had been a very
precious weapon that anyone could barely boast of. An exquisite happiness of
holding such a weapon kept blooming in us.
We were aware that
the enemy would know every sound of our steps. Balan, as usual, was very
attentive and careful more than me in my safety. He might have felt that he
must do something eccentric that night. He got up exactly at twelve in the
midnight and wished me happy birthday, went out with the M-16 and fired a full
round of bullets into the sky. The bullets were shot into the sky streaking
like fire flowers and disappeared. He then looked back, and told me proudly,
“Look here, ordinary people would burst Chinese made crackers for their
birthdays. But I have burst American bullets for your birthday.” An
indescribable ecstasy in his eyes!
Balan was shot
dead by an enemy sniper in the conflict occurred next day morning. He fell down
dead right in front of my eyes. His body didn’t have any movement. The sniper
must have sharpened his eyes through his rifle’s aperture looking for another
kill who would come out of his hideout to carry the dead body. I thought of
jumping onto where Balan was lying dead to pull him my side. A bitter liquid
started secreting in my tongue; a deep burning sensation crept into chest and
stomach. My whole body grew immobile as if frozen while seeing Balan lying
dead.
Balan’s death had
sowed in me a sort of massive emptiness. The last smile he threw at me previous
night was still floating in my heart. My love for rifles had also left me since
that day, and of course, the life in liberation movement too.
5
On one of those my
routine days of stay under a similar tarpaulin provided by the benevolent
United Nations in an Indonesian refugee camp after having been fully uprooted
from both war and my mother land, I had met Vaishali, a legal assistant working
there. When she came there as a translator for a meeting with an official from
the UN, I stuck up a conversation with her. To my utter shock, she brought a
cake on my birthday though our acquaintance with each other was nothing beyond
some odd telephonic conversations and occasional meetings. I had been happy the
whole day. It was the day I felt fully pleased on a foreign land. Suddenly I
rose from the bed just before going to sleep and deeply delved into thoughts.
When I realised that my mind had been fully occupied with the thoughts of
Vaishali blissfully oblivious of the death anniversary of Balan that day, I
grew intimidated. I was sweating slightly. Next day morning, I understood my
heart was fully occupied with Vaishali again.
Vaishali hailed
from Yazhpanam. A divorcee. She worked as a translator in the United Nations
office in Indonesia and later learnt the laws related to immigrants and was now
working as a legal assistant to the refugees. People in the camp gossiped that
she had married an Indonesian government employee second time and later got
divorced from him. I was inclined to believe that my indifference not to get
involved in her personal affairs might be the reason for her affection towards
me.
One day Vaishali
told me under the shade of an egg fruit tree standing in front of the refugee
camp, in a lowered voice “How long would it take to leave this camp for getting
into another country? Without knowing when its furtive means would open up,
please don’t ever get settled down under another tarpaulin somewhere.
Indonesian government is recruiting suitable persons for its Narcotics Control
Bureau. If you join there after you are freed from here, you can earn a
handsome amount of money and get an opportunity to work closely with the
government. So, it is wiser to try it now.”
I could understand
that her words sounded as an invisible concern coming out of her untold love
for me.
Vaishali was so
familiar with the local culture that she would be able to assess the time of a
tree bearing an unripe fruit and the methods of getting it ripe next day. She
was fully aware of my life. If she could suggest a way to go forward, there
would neither be check posts nor any snipers on my way, I strongly believed. My
proficiency in Indonesian language which I could acquire during my two years
stay in the refugee camp proved an important asset.
After freed from
the refugee camp, I was lodging in a room in front of Vaishali’s residence. She
thought that I had preferred staying away from her. She might have thought that
I shouldn’t be under an impression to have taken a residence for the sake of my
love. A heavy rain that lashed the vicinity on the day I was staying in her
house caused severe seepage in my room, making rain water falling into my room
like water falls leaving my only cot badly damaged. After that, I went to bed
with her that night, and slept there.
Next day the sky
looked spotlessly clean and beautiful. Vaishali downloaded the relevant
documents to apply for narcotics prevention training under Indonesian
Immigration department and carefully filled in the details, and got them attested
by authorities wherever required. Other than personally attending the training,
she did complete all the requirement of application.
The classes began
at a training centre of Immigration Department in Sukubota situated a little
distance away from Indonesian capital Jakarta. There, I became friendly with
Kattona, a man with buck teeth and never dying smile on everything. He was
born, brought up in Indonesia and had even tasted the life in incarceration
there. His nose with a tiny curve at its tip resembled Balan’s nose. He would
burst out laughter for everything. It seemed that he would give out a laugh
first before crying.
It was only after
the start of training, I could understand that the job was no way better than
catching stray dogs on streets - catching drug peddlers with no sign of mercy.
Our work involved in catching people with narcotics, stuffing them into
vehicles and throwing them into prisons by charging them under various
draconian laws of the land. Going by the conservative estimate given by that
upright, iron bodied Indonesian officer who had taken our classes for a week, I
presumed that half of the Indonesia’s population must have been thrown into
perdition.
One day, after
lunch hours Kattona, while puffing on his cigarette advised me, “Even if you
arrest someone and throw him into jail, he would somehow manage his release by
way of bribing some officials. So, instead of wasting time resenting the laws
and spoiling health, one should think of only his salaries and his household
chores” Though his words fell off an innuendo amidst his trademark smiles, I
could appreciate the compelling truth behind it.
He took out a
photograph of three women from his pocket, showed it to me, and smiled till his
dented nose became red.
“All three are
your daughters?” I asked him, surprised.
“Cheee…the one in
the middle is my wife” now his face blushed redder.
In the sixth week,
we were exposed to shooting with fire arms in Bamukka Island situated very near
to Jakarta. I never imagined that the classes would graduate into a
full-fledged arms training. That iron bodied tutor told us specific tasks would
be allotted to the trainees on the basis of their performance. I informed
Vaishali of everything. I was scared at the possibility of them dig out my past
that dragged me till Balamottai.
“No one would come
to apprehend you on the basis of your skills in shooting. It is almost like a
government job. Salary will be more. Don’t waste your time anymore” Vaishali
assuaged my fears in her usual style and put a full stop to my anxiety.
At times, Vaishali
could gauge my moods very effectively when I was troubled with my past which
was laden with my life with guns. She would take the role of a doctor with
assuaging words to dismantle the heaviness of my thoughts. Her words would
carry plenty of finer aspects which I had never experienced in my life. The
thoughts that were pulled apart in her presence would come again and hover over
my head as low lying clouds.
Kattona once told
that the Indonesian Special Forces were using Italian made Beretta guns and the
guns for other ordinary police forces were locally manufactured in Indonesia.
We were divided
into two groups on the basis of our performance in the training at the end of
seventh week. A part of them was allotted to work on field in urban areas as
Special Narcotics Control Bureau personnel. The officer wearing medals in
different colours standing in front of the class called out to everyone by
their names. I was eagerly watching his lips for my name to fall out of it.
My name didn’t
come out of his mouth. I looked at Kattona. I saw him for the first time
struggling to smile. Those who found their names in the list were led to
another classroom. Three officers in dark uniform entered as the last person on
the list was leaving the class. They looked stiff bodied, as if they were the
siblings of my iron bodied tutor. They seemed to have understood that we stood
utterly confused. One of those officers whose haggard right cheek bearing five
or six big scars as if bitten by honey bees began addressing us.
“We have decided
to have you both in the specialised team that executes capital punishment on
the basis of your performance in shooting training. We seek your opinion on
this”- the officer spoke straightway without mincing words. When he was done
with his speech, I felt a stone got struck in my throat.
“The Commander of
the special force will explain you the special allowances and concessions you
are eligible for. I don’t expect you to reply immediately today itself” he
concluded his intimidating speech with a mild smile. Other standing there gave
their customary speeches after him. I ran out of the hall, got a cigarette from
Kattona, lit it and picked the phone to dial Vaishali.
Vaishali repeated
her cool words again, with a couple of additional important words of advice.
“In life we would
come across such unexpected opportunities. Since you are not accustomed with
such things, you get shocked at it. It is just a plain opportunity given to you
for your skills. Other teams didn’t get it. Right? This is an opportunity
destined for you and it has come to you. Do I have to teach you how the life
with weapons would be?
My second
cigarette was also over.
It was dreadful to
think that the weapons could still pull me towards their swirls though I had
come a long distance away from them. Further, the thoughts of Balan still
remained fresh in my memory rendering me crippled not to come out of guilt I
was wracked with. Those thoughts of despondency were trying to raise up in me
again as bands of thick smoke.
After dinner,
Vaishali and I went out for a stroll. She could assess the mental turmoil
brewing in me. Before I began talking about it, she remarked, “You have grown
rusty with rifles”. I could feel her presence deep in me when she uttered those
words suddenly. She spoke looking straight into my eyes.
“We presume that
we hold rights over many things in life. This society and laws of this land
invariably accept it and acknowledge it. But the truth is something else.
Practicality is something different” Some workers were filing the sand in the
ditch dug for giving outlet to the water tank kept in a corner of her house. We
crossed the street and went to other side.
“It includes
husband, children and friendship…everything”- resuming her talk from the point
where she had left and concluded with an amiable tone “They might belong to us,
but we can’t own them”
She was walking
silently. I understood that it was a silence to prompt me to introspect. Balan,
rifles, struggles- all came over my mind in sequence one after another.
6
The commander of
the execution squad and his team led us to Komodo Island. We were imparted an
extremely secret training there. The training modules included exhaustive
deliberations on procedures to bring the prisoners who were awarded death
punishment by shooting as per Indonesian laws, how to send their dead bodies in
coffins and other tasks the team had to execute collectively. The trainer said
that one should be mentally strong and poised to execute the punishments. He
further explained various cruel methods of putting one to death that once
existed under the reigns of ancient kings. Our government had devised methods
that rendered the criminals face death with minimum pain compared to those
brutal ones of ancient times, he reasoned.
As a part of our
training, a live telecast of awarding death punishment given to a Philippino
that month had been arranged. The criminal tied tightly to a pole from head to
neck is shot simultaneously by nine members of the execution squad and dies as
his head hangs in the front. The show got just over leaving me reminisce it no
way second to any English movies and a tiny part of array of incidents that I
had come across in my past. A tingling sensation caused by an old thorn jabbed
my feet flashed for a second in mind and disappeared. Then, they announced that
they were going to take us to the real execution fields in Indonesia and show
us the arrangements made there.
Later, we were led
to Nusa Island lying near Indonesia. We were given our uniforms. The military
vehicles would pass through a small narrow land strip made of gravel from the
main land to reach that island. Kattona told me that the villagers called that
uninhabited island as “The Island of demons”. The criminals carrying death
penalty for the heinous crimes they committed in Indonesia were incarcerated in
a big prison complex there. Most of them were languishing, serving their terms
in that prison for a long time. Others were brought there as criminals carrying
death punishment. Sooner the date of execution is decided by the government,
they would be led to “Vadimutram”- the place of execution- straight away from
their sleep in the early mornings and would be delivered with summary
execution.
Blood and death
are very familiar to me. I have bathed in it happily. I have grown with a
perception that life is nothing but one’s body. I share an intimate
relationship with rifles. I had felt a streak of love only with Balan. I lost
it in a brutal way. Now Vaishali has been filling in that gap. Without them, I
would just be as inanimate as a rifle. My feelings never existed in me rather
they existed outside. It seemed that I lived my life liking it that way.
So, the procedures
built around this death punishment and the dark truths surrounding it just did
look like festivities happening other side of the world.
7
We, the
squad delivering death were called “Mobi Squad”. The letters ‘Mobi 16’ were
inscribed on my dark uniform. We were all given M-16 assault rifle for
execution. American made rifle. Shined in our hands. When I received it in my
hands, I felt Balan was standing near smiling at me. I turned back
instinctively. Kattona was standing near. The uniforms have been made as
tightly as possible sticking to our frames accommodating other essentials along
with rifles. They had been made in such manner that a deep sense of fear would
be evoked in the minds of prisoners the moment they looked at us in uniforms. A
gear fully covering the head barring eyes and noses had also been provided.
Kattona could be identified only with the help of the digits he bore.
We came to know
that a Nigerian national charged with the crime of possessing narcotics was to
be executed that day we had gone to Nusa Island. When we were taken to that
island in the early morning, we could comfortably infer that the entire task
would be over shortly.
That Nigerian in
blue T shirt and black pant was brought to the Vadimutram. Well-toned muscular
bodied man. We couldn’t see how he looked minutes before he entered the gateway
of his death. The officials with their faces fully covered were standing around
him. They were scrupulously checking the arrangements with the sole aim of not
allowing him to escape his death under any circumstances. After tying him to a
pole, a pastor went near to him and recited some psalms. All the nine gunners
collected their respective rifles that were kept in rows. They aligned their
front foot with the white line drawn in front of the pole. One of them went
near to the Nigerian, placed his finger in a circle drawn in white colour on
his chest. All the laser beams streaking from their rifles focussed on that
circle. In seconds, that officer returned to the white line where squad was
standing. Laser beams, looking static were still focussed on Nigerian’s chest.
I had heard that
the criminals to be executed would be given sedatives in order not to feel the
pain of death. I could hear a mild moan unceasingly coming out of the
Nigerian’s face mask. I first thought that it was the sound of pastor singing
psalms. His moans were clearly audible
now. His last moans of
misery for this world that floated around the air were coming out of him in
intermittent bouts of heavy breath and whimpers.
During our
training, we were taught that the bullets would be discharged only from three
gunners as though all nine gunners would fire shots from their rifles. Both the
shooters and the ones who kept the rifles ready wouldn’t be even aware of those
rifles from which the bullets were to be fired. In flash of a freaking sound, we
found the Nigerian’s head covered in black cloth leaning left, and hung
immobile.
All the shooters
were still standing on the white line without movement. The head of the firing
squad went near to the executed Nigerian along with a doctor wearing a black over-coat.
As soon as the doctor declared the Nigerian dead, the gunners came in queue,
kept the rifles neatly where they had picked them and entered the hall.
The thick black
smoke rose up in me again.
‘Who’s this man?
Why do I have to shoot him down? This place is neither meant for valiant
actions with guns nor reading books. All what they need is just a life tied to
a pole. I just need to chest up with pride that I have served the laws of
Indonesia the moment I see him lying dead. Perhaps, my pride will be
complemented with more money.
The hatred and
bitterness for guns that sprang up in my heart at seeing Balan’s dead body had
now started enervating my very soul. I couldn’t come out of the mess I created.
Someone who had received military training would nevertheless treat his feeling
just like a worm crawling on his body. He might sometimes find comforts with it
scratching the spots it crawled. But it loses its value beyond it. I remembered
the voids that were filled in with my thoughts while walking along with
Vaishali.
The head of our
squad asked us to go to bed early in the evening for adequate rest since the
prisoner who was to be executed next day had already been brought to the
island. They led us somewhere outside Nusa Island and housed us in a military
base very near to the island. While everyone retired to their rooms, I went to
mine, bathed, changed my dress and dialled Vaishali. When I told her I would be
able to return only after completing the assigned task, I realised she could
catch the change in my tone.
“It’s nothing. We
can discuss it after my coming”
“I guess you face
no troubles” she asked me again.
“No” I told,
tossed my body onto the cot.
It was seven O’
clock when I woke up. Bathed again and went out. The meals were kept ready in
the dining hall of the military base.
“The prisoner
who’s going to be executed tomorrow is an Australian” Kattona brought his mouth
very near to my ears, and told in a hushed tone. Would the nationality of a man
make any difference once I have decided to wield the gun to shoot? Among those
nine rifles, there was no guarantee that the rounds would be fired from my
rifle – a probability that assuaged my temporarily growing anxiety. I kept the
plate washing it, stepped out of the dining hall.
The head of the
squad asked us all to don our uniform. The black powell military van sped away
towards Nusa Island at about half past ten.
8
People were
crowding in front of the gravel strip leading to the island. Big electric
lights backed by generators were throwing their bright lights onto the streets.
The place was abuzz with sudden business activities- fruit shops on the
platform, and roadside eateries where one had to stand to eat-all that
showed up there all of a sudden. If any foreigner got a death punishment in the
‘Island of demons’, the island would witness an enthusiastic crowd flocking to
its gateway. These ‘new’ shops would remain open for at least two days to cater
to the needs of the crowd. “These shop keepers would see a good business during
these days”, Kattona told.
Some boys with
baskets of pine apples on their heads were found striding through the crowd
busy selling the fruits. Since entry to the “Island of Demons” was banned, a
multitude of journalists were waiting very near to the gravel strip with their
cameras fixed on tripods. Sooner our car neared the land strip, their cameras
began flashing against us. The escort van speeding behind us gave out a loud
siren and dispersed the crowd that surrounded us. Local policemen were also
deployed there to control the mob. They were standing on both sides of the
road, prevented the curious onlookers at bay and paved us way to march ahead.
Opposite to media men, some were standing under a tarpaulin resembling that of
one given by the United Nations. We, somehow, managed to cross the barricade
placed by the police across the land strip and entered the island.
Nusa military base
and Vadimutram were fully illumined with flood lights like previous night. The
lights were so bright that it shone like day enabling one to see even the tips
of grass blades clearly. The squad leader read out the list and thus got my
place confirmed among those nine men who had to go to the white line. Following
it, a doctor came, checked our pulse holding our wrists. He ensured we had
normal blood pressure.
Exactly twenty
minutes past midnight, we, all nine, were led to the white line. American made
M16 rifles were kept neatly in a row. When we reached the white line wielding
our rifles, we found the condemned Australian whose head was fully covered with
a mask tightly tied to a pole, and kept ready to receive our bullets. Our squad
leader checked our face masks once again to ensure that they didn’t obstruct
our view.
A Christian pastor
went to the prisoner tied to the pole, took a circle around him singing some
psalms. As he left the prisoner, our squad leader and the doctor took positions
on our sides, stood near to us. I sharpened my ears to hear the prisoner, but
no sound came from him.
When the reverse
count-down from three to one gets over, we should have completed our task in
the laser circle. It was very difficult to reconcile with the fact that my
hands which once carried weapons for the freedom of a country were now carrying
weapons for some other purpose in a different country. But where is the weapon
that could save me from the drudgeries lying between weapons and life?
Thoughts came
through, gushing again in the heart. A bitterness seemed to have stuck on my
tongue. My jaws grew stiff and heart beats became faster. I could feel my face
emitting hot air in the face mask.
“Thdmm…” a sharp
bursting noise.
I felt a strong
recoil of rifle’s butt on my chest! I stood frozen that moment. O! My God!
9
My squad leader
and the doctor went to the pole to ascertain the prisoner’s death. The
assistants in Vadimutram came in a queue, untied the rope fastened with the
pole, gently tilted it and left with the dead body on a canvass stretcher.
When our powell
military van came out of the island through the narrow land strip, the
supporters of the Indonesian Welfare Association who were in favour of death
penalty assembled in front of it, shrieked cheerfully bursting crackers. The
media took photos of our van from all directions spinning their cameras in
various angles. It just appeared that it was a dance of night in that street
due to the relentless noises of vehicles.
I stood totally
shocked when I saw a woman standing under the tarpaulin other side of the
street came running towards our van, scooped out handfuls of sand from the
ground, and threw it on our vehicle cursing us in Tamil, “You, the ruined! You
have killed my son! Your families would never prosper!”. The feeble Tamil curse
“You, the ruined! You have killed my son! Your families would never
prosper!” kept ringing in my ears.
I kneeled down, my
hands soaked in blood that hadn’t dried yet, glanced at the direction from
where the hapless yells of that mother came, and prayed, “O! My land! My land!
Please don’t curse me anymore”.
Yet, her voice was
still stalking me like an echo of despair.
***Ended***
